btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
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