It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
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