Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
