Can Purell be used as lube?
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
