I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
