I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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