playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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