Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Randomize
