I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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