just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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