So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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