It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize