8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
