I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
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