i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Everyone says I win the strip club
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
