I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize
