Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
