No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
Randomize
