You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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