Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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