So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize
