its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
