found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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