ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Randomize
