I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
