"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I am one with the molecules
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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