Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize