Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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