I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
