We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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