O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
