In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
