Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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