Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
