i need an iv and a liver transplant
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Even my vagina gasped.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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