Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
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