connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
dude. I can hear the air.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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