so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
