Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
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