i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
