Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Randomize