think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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