Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
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