how can u be prego again
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
