there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
No subtext here. People are naked.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
So squirting runs in the family.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
