hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize