we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
Randomize
