My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
