YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
