It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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