She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
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