You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I miss vodka workout Fridays
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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